Got back after a long time. 3 and 5 exams came n gone now. Did really good in some of them. So is a bit happy. It was on 10th I left for hostel. Shammu, Vikas n Rida was there. Swaroop too. All were studying. They did well in exams too. But sessionals :( hmm.. Hope the God will be with us. Vipin, Shijin, Sukesh all used to come n go. Didn't write ECS but did really well in TOC. Me n Shaman was happy to end it up with a good one. Swaroop is going b'lore in this week. Shaheez too. By the next month, half of CSEB will be there in b'lore. So b'lore boys n gals beware k.
I was sitting simply. Its then the idea come to my mind. Write a poem. Thus I gave life to my first poem. It was in Malayalam. When I came here and tried to post it in Malayalam, there was some technical problems. So I decided to convert it to English. As I am a product of Malayalam medium school. I found little difficulty. Its Srikanth helped me most. Jaison n Hasif all helped. Apart from all of them the characters in poem helped me!. So read n comment. Its my first one.Plz don't disappoint me :D All suggestions are welcome.
It was in a desert, we met first
Which created an oasis in my mind.
I felt something for you
Which I've never felt for anyone.
Those beautiful eyes, sound
Made a breeze inside my heart
But I was afraid,
Even when I said my love for u
The fear that, I'll lose you?
As I feared,
I got my love crushed.
But I didn't feel anything.
'Cause I was dead inside.
My love for you,
Made me a joker for others.
But i didn't hear what they said;
I didn't even understand what I heard.
'Cause my mind was full of you.
I didn't know u got other nests to sleep.
I was already mad when I came to know it.
But you didn't know what real love is.
Time had made, money n pride,
Your new lovers.
I sought shelter in the net thrown by death,
But God started hearing my prayers.
When god was in my mind's workshop,
You were getting married.
Then I thought of me for the first time.
When I was traveling back from desert
An old man told me,
There's spring in somewhere away.
I looked back,
The spring that was u, had begun to fade.
Over. hows it. Leave comments oki. Nothing else Gnt.
really great one...
ReplyDeleteits horrible......eeeee
ReplyDeleteoooo nintey ullilum oru kalakarano....hhhmmm.....chekkan ws in love...paaawam....hehehehe.........its nice ma fren.....u really made use of all guidelines i gave u....keep it up.......
ReplyDeleteits really nice deepz.......do continue...don stop it here....my motivation will always b thr for u....hehehe
ReplyDeleteenthoru sargaathmakatha...nee ithra bayankaranaanennu njaan arinjilla...but i cudn find sfi in that kavitha..whr s tat...ninakkum premamo...naaikaatathinum europian closeto
ReplyDeleteshooooooo.........enthoru bhavana.....mmmm aranu ee kavithayile....nayika????
ReplyDeleteEda pattiii....
ReplyDeleteYou stole my POEM??
Guys we are roommates!! and he stole my KAVITHA from my PETTI!!
This is my Kavithaa!
KAVITHA KALLAA!!
:)
hmm..
To Rameez:
ReplyDeleteNinak njan vachittundu.
To Nibul:
No comments to my roommate :D
i wish i could read the orginal one(malayalam)u know my knowledge in english :)
ReplyDeletebut anyway there s smthing in it that i can feel it by simply reading it.....hope u hav gud future in kavitha(in kavitha's cafe -chayya addikkal)
hope u dont miss my latest kavitha
"panthrandu makkale pettoramme ninte makkalil evanannu branthuu..."
Kavitha is wonderful..
ReplyDeleteEe varshathe award ninakk thanne urappa...
But who's the paavam unlucky gal????
hey!! gr8!! really touchin... u ve good writin skills.. bring it up.. all d best...
ReplyDeleteaayooo eni nammal endoke kananam...?
ReplyDelete,,,kavitha kolaam...:)
da,,ninakenthada ..vatttayo??
ReplyDeletegud one........wat ever......may be bad........!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletehahaha.....the poem is nice...but its so unexpected of u...especially if its abt some chick...shocking!!!...i agree wit ramy mon...
ReplyDelete..thavalakkum muscle'lo ??..:-)
horrible.how could any one who appreciate the beauty of literature stand this crap.this guy shud be stoned to death by forefathers of literature.how dare you mr randeep.how could you defame the holy shrine of english literature.shame on you.you ll answerable to this generation for causin this kind of pain.you ve opened the pandoras box which will spell your doom.
ReplyDeletehmmm..impressive...tht too frm randeep he he....does this kind f feeling xist in this world...?
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteAlthough this translated version has been toned down a bit from the original malayalam one..I guess it to be left out due to not knowing whether it would fit in with the rhyming scheme published here..Though there is no such rhyming to name of in much of poem..Good translatory skill by whomsoever it was done..
ReplyDeleteAnd this poem originally sprout up in Nibul the poets mind..Randeep stole it using his psychic skills..
I agree with Fazil on stoning him..He has made a grave mistake in stealing from poor Mr.Gustav's/Sir Alex "Fergunan" n all that he is known to people around..
All the characters in this poem are fictitious.Resemblance to any person living or dead is purely coincidencial.
Atleast thats what Randeep wants people to think.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletetats not fare u dodo...u cant just delete the comments u dont like...its our true opinion...take like a man buttface....:-)
ReplyDeleteThat comment by me was deleted by me..A technical error..my bad..
ReplyDeleteRandeep the poet..had nothing to do with it..He is busy stealing Nibul's next poem..
have to say..am surprised..is the nayika for real?...neways u have got talent man..ada patuvanel kavitha kurachoode simple aaki paranju tharane...hehe...
ReplyDeletekavitha kollam ...pakshe vayichittu onnum thonniyilla..oru pakshe enikku ninnekkalum kala bodham ulla karanam aayirikkum,,,,sorry my old room mate.....2/10..veendum suppli...hehehe
ReplyDeleteI studied in an english medium school
ReplyDeleteI was not all that bad in english
But still I find it really difficult to pen a poem
I just respect people who are able to do it
Good poem,as I said in d previous comment do try to rhyme it.I was trying to convert it into malayalam ...nice work bro...i ll try n read all yo posts within this month since our holidays r startin....do keep it coming
Thankz alot Alex :D
ReplyDeletegood one.. but im sure the malayalam version would be 100% best. :)
ReplyDeleteindu
thats a nice poem :)
ReplyDelete10 Years!!
ReplyDelete