Calling out your name loud

Your nick name is echoing in my head always.
It has become difficult for me not to call it out loud.
When in bed I roll restlessly.
When nobody is around, I call it quiet.
But its not helping me.
When at work, I'm afraid that I might scream.

Probably, I'll go to a mountain top,
And call it out loud till I feel a little better.

Just to feel better;
Not to make me understand I can never call you that again.